Stop Expecting: Managing is not Parenting



I’ve just read somewhere that: “a good manager makes you grow, supports you for good, generates enthusiasm, shows what should be done, rewards…” blah-blah.

Let me straighten this out a bit.
Are they seriously talking about a relation between 2 adults where it’s agreed that one is the manager and the other is managed (?), where there are 2 contracts linking each parties to a company for its development with the full consent of all parties?

All right, so now let us go through the assumptions they started with:
1) A manager makes you grow:
Wow! Two adults, right? May I remind them that we are in a partnership where no matter if we like it or not we will grow anyhow together for the time we decide to stay, the manager and the managed one! Whether ‘it’ ‘works’ or not, we will learn something, it can be tough but we’ll both definitely not be the same than when ‘it’ all started.
2) A manager supports you for good:
According to which definition of ‘good’? Primarily the ‘good’ of the company we are both employed by of course! That means that one day if the company decides to end one of the contracts, it does not necessary mean the manager was bad or the managed one was bad it can just be that the circumstances are not that ‘good’ for the company itself so your ‘good’ is suddenly not the same ‘good’ for all. Sometimes we are left to hope it is for our ‘good’ at the end of times just in order to keep on.
3) A manager generates enthusiasm:
Gosh! If an adult has to expect from another to generate enthusiasm on a day-to-day base in order to be enthusiastic! What a burden! We are all responsible of our own enthusiasm. It is our responsibility to live in the most enthusiastic possible way because nobody nothing can pay back for the time you waste in boredom or misery as an adult. So commit yourself: if you decide to stay, stay with enthusiasm or leave immediately!
4) A manager shows what should be done:
So we assume again one knows everything and the other knows nothing? Interesting conception of management, totally closed to anything new. Even somebody without experience can actually refresh the way you see and do things by just talking about it from another perspective so listening can be vital for anyone.
5) A manager rewards:
"Good boy"? Are we left begging for a chocolate like in a kindergarten? Please let us all check within where our recognition lies! First of all sometimes a manager does not really have the power to actually reward but moreover should we keep on with this childish wording? As adults we should actually dare to renegotiate our contract while keeping in mind ‘if I stay, I stay with enthusiasm or I leave immediately’.


‘Managing’ or ‘being managed’ should mean to play your part with responsibility in a healthy way for the betterment of all or… leave!

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